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Holidays suck : / I know I sound completly synical, but Holidays do suck sometimes... This week has started out like all the other years i've been single, crappy!! I got a little down, but didn't want to fall into my old routine of playing sappy crappy love, broken hearted, lonliness songs in bed, so I just went to sleep.... I started thinking, well I had a great guy earlier this year, and things were great, till they weren't, i'm sure he thought I was a nagging hag, and I thought him to be an unmotivated ass, you know the usual. It just sucks, cause I wanted to him, but I know I don't want to be with him, but I don't want to be alone, so idk... I miss having someone, someone to talk to everyday, text all day, and smile when I see their name or pic pop up on my , it's just so hard to overlook major flaws, and downfalls, I seem normal, why can't I find a normal guy, well turns out i'm probably not normal, and well that normal perfect guy doesn't exist, cause neither does his counterpart. I'm not perfect by any means, nor do I think I am, but I act a certain way in public, and expect the same from a partner. I don't have kids, but want them, and love them to pieces.... I live alone, but this bed gets cold at night.... I work, make my own way, love my life mostly, and just want someone to share it with... I'm a large woman, and am confident, but just a little down tonight...

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